Love Actually is All Around

When I turned 30, it was like a switch had flipped. The angst of my 20s were gone. I knew who I was and stopped apologizing for it. The pesky “Who am I? What am I supposed to do with my life?” questions were answered.  Life was good and the future was brighter than ever before. Photo with my besties from my 30th birthday party Fast forward a few years and Bam! I feel like I’m back in the same place again. I am angsty and questioning my identity…again.  It feels different this time, but frustrating nonetheless. It’s like the ground I worked so hard to gain is slipping under my feet. Like I’m on a treadmill that’s going too fast and I keep falling back to the end of the belt, about to fall off. There is a lot that factors into this season – some life changes. Some unmet expectations. Dreams that haven’t been fulfilled.  Sorry I won’t be more specific, but I’m honestly not comfortable voicing these tender things to the world. My guess is you can relate.  So...

Before and After My dining room doesn’t have much natural light in it. It’s on the interior wall of my small condo and there are no windows. As a result, I don’t really like spending time in there. When I have people over for meals, we eat in the living room.  My poor dining room (the first room you see upon entry) has become a glorified closet over the past 6 years. It’s where I leave my shoes, throw my mail, drop my keys.  And I hate it.  I hate how messy it gets. I hate not having a space where I can eat with guests. As Jimmy Fallon would say: Like. Ew. I’m not really gifted in interior design. I need help and inspiration.  I invited a couple friends over (Sarah and Sus) to help inspire me.  We ate in the dining room – one of the few times in 6 years I’ve eaten in there. We talked about the space and how I felt there. How it could be changed.  And off we went!  In the span of one week, I painted the hutch and table. I made a new tabletop w...

I recently watched Newsies  with my friend, Juliet.  It brought me back to my 13-year-old self. I watched that movie so many times as a teen. Yes, mostly because of my crush on Christian Bale (which is still alive and well today, thanks for asking).  I’d like to think it also had something to do with the themes surrounding justice and family and dreams. The main character, Jack Kelly, finds himself controlled by "the man."  Struggling to get by and survive in New York City, he has no family to rely on and he creates a fantasy world to which he can escape. For Jack, this fantasy is Santa Fe – a place where he can be free, like the wind (the song explains it well) .  I find myself doing this, don’t you? I have a very wild imagination and have multiple alternate realities swirling around in my head. A few examples: working in the Civil Rights division at the Department of Justice; working on the communications team in the West Wing (both on the TV show and in ...

Here are TV characters with whom I would like to have an americano or beer.  I tried to narrow it down to 10 characters and had to settle instead on 10 shows (in no particular order): 1. Josh Lyman, President Barlet, Leo McGarry and CJ Cregg ( The West Wing ).  I could go on and on for my reasons why, but suffice it to say my interest (and idealism) regarding politics makes me so excited at the idea of sitting around the table (or the Oval Office) with these people. 2. Dan Rydell ( Sports Night ) – Yes, another Aaron Sorkin character.  Dan is funny and thoughtful and knows a lot about sports and friendship. I could learn a lot from this guy, and would really enjoy the conversation 3. Leslie Knope ( Parks & Recreation ): We could talk about how great Pawnee/Muncie is. And I am dying to hear about her encounter with Joe Biden.  Of course, we would chat over waffles. 4. Starbuck/Kara ( Battlestar Galactica ): No spoilers here. I’ll just say it wou...

Disclaimer:  If you are not "religious," please bear with me. I think you will still find this post interesting. Today marks the beginning of Holy Week - the final week leading up to Easter.   The last week of Lent.  On Friday, I will attend a Tenebrae/Good Friday service which reminds me of and invites me into the death of Christ.  On Easter morning, I will gather with my church family at sunrise around a bon fire where we will celebrate the Risen Son. But what is all this ritual about?  Well, too much to write here.  But I was reminded this morning of a few aspects of this season that challenge me. I love living in the Northern Hemisphere and in an area that experiences all four seasons.  After the worst winter I can remember, I have never longed more for Spring.  Anything that was left exposed to the brutal elements this winter most certainly died.  And yet trees have buds on them and the grass is turning green again.  From dea...

Sochi in Summer I love watching the Olympics.  It has been especially fun seeing them in Sochi, where I had the opportunity to visit in 2005.  I spent a couple weeks in Russia with my friend, Tina, visiting her parents who were living there at the time.  There are so many things I could share about my time there, but I have narrowed it down to one story. Tina's parents did all sorts of good work in their community there. Her dad was a pastor and her mom was a nurse by trade.  But really, they were simply great at loving people.  They somehow got connected with an alcoholic rehab center and took Tina and I there to visit.  The center was for men who were looking to turn their lives around. It was in the country - what appeared to my foreign eyes as the middle of nowhere.  The center was run by 2 former Olympic athletes who had devoted their lives to helping these men. The center itself was essentially a farm.  The men were learning to live o...

In January of this year, I started keeping a gratitude jar (yes, thanks Pinterest)  .  In essence, I wrote things on small pieces of paper that I was grateful for - big and small.  I was better at doing this regularly in the beginning of 2013, and tapered off a bit toward the end of the year.  Still, it's been fun to read through them and see the things that have happened this past year.  A few themes emerged: My travels  took me to Texas in January on an amazing adventure with Sarah.  We explored Austin, San Antonio and finished in Denton with my dear friend Philippe de Neige.  Sarah is my travel buddy - who else would want to visit Friday Night Lights filming locations with me?  Or spend hours drinking delicious whiskey at Contigo?  And hearing Philippe talk about the book he's writing about zombies was such a gift!  I can't wait to read the finished book, friend. I also had the pleasure of visiting Grand Cayman in March - ...